I have been feeling pretty good the last few weeks. I’m thankful for all the sunshine we had last week, it really brightens my mood and gives me energy. I was able to spend some great time with Brandon while the other 3 kids had other things going on. We went to the park with friends, enjoyed ice cream for lunch in Fort Langley and took Molly for a walk to look for birds. I was thankful I was able to do all this.
This week is a little more low key. I seem to be fighting some stomach issues. It’s not uncommon for me but leaves me feeling tired and run down. That’s why I take things one day at a time. I am feeling a bit more comfortable making commitments. I am happy to be stepping out and helping where I am needed. I do come with a warning, ” as long as I’m ok”. However I feel like it helps me not feel so secluded from life. I enjoy being around other people and it feels really nice.
However the future is never certain. As far as leukaemia goes, I’m good! I’m thankful for that. I have some concerning spots in my mouth that need to be monitored but I am not worried about it. A biopsy has been done and another one needs to be done in April but I’m feeling ok with it.
I did have a colonoscopy last week Monday that does have me worried. The results couldn’t come quick enough. I’m trying to distract myself so I don’t think too much about it. The reason I had it was because last year they found a small polyp while looking for gvhd. I had taken my blood thinner so they couldn’t remove it. Due to me being high risk for secondary cancers it was decided to do a full colonoscopy. I honestly wasn’t expecting anything else to be found. Unfortunately a large ugly looking polyp was found. I watched the whole thing and cannot get that picture out of my head. Another doctor was called in. I don’t remember what was said ( I had a bit of sedation) . However the doctor didn’t want to talk about it with me until I wasn’t on any sedation. She wrote a note on my paper to discuss surgery because it’s too large to remove via colonoscopy. She also wrote that my kids and siblings need colonoscopy starting at 30 instead of 50. So I wait.
I know God has my life planned out and I know if this is cancer that I’m pretty tough and can kick it again with Gods help. The thought of going through it terrifies me though. So I’m reaching out to anyone who follows me to please pray that this is not cancer. I really feel like things are starting to get better for me and I just can’t imagine going back down this road.